About 18 months ago, I remember telling a few of my friends of my ‘plan’. Out of all of them, a few of them were 100% behind me, the others seemed to presume it was just an off the cuff idea and something which I’d never go through with.
I’m not the most outgoing person ever and some people don’t think I’ll manage too well on my own– I’m quite happy to sit back and let others take the limelight – but when I have to be outgoing I will be…albeit with a massive dose of awkwardness. I’m not used to being out of my comfort zone – ever. But at the end of any awkwardness I may perceive myself to have, I know I get along with people. Even if I do say so myself, I’m an all round good egg which is why, amongst other things, I’m so pissed off with people not repaying money I’d borrowed them. But being an all round good egg also has its upsides: such as a couple of friends borrowing me a lot of money to replace the money I’d lost and work giving me quite a bit of cash as a leaving gift. Add this to the bits of money family have given me and I’ve now got quite a bit of breathing space as far as my finances go (the total opposite to where I was at a month ago)! I’m not used to people being nice to me and over the last few days I’ve had to fight back the tears when I’ve been saying goodbye to people.
I’m not the first person to do something like this on my own and I certainly won’t be the last. I am however the first person in my family to do something like this and as such I’m looked on as if I’ve suddenly become a modern day Christopher Columbus.
Before I sound like a wanky 18 year old gap year student (instead I’ll just sound like a wanky 31 year old): I said all along this is the one and only thing I’ve wanted to do for as long as I can remember. If it lasts a week, a month, a year, or even longer, no one will ever be able to take it away from me…and that is what this is all about…I don’t want to turn 40 and curse myself for never doing it. No regrets.
I don’t think it will sink in until I’m there. Neither am I half as nervous as I thought I might be. But tomorrow I’m going to do something I never ever thought I’d be able to do, or say I was doing…
“I’m going to Australia”
Fucking get in!