The Weather

I can’t get excited by the weather in any way, shape or form.  I was oblivious to everything yesterday until I fired up Facebook and Twitter to see millions of “IT’S SNOWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” type messages.

I’m surprised David Attenborough hasn’t yet put one of them sweeping cameras (the ones which are used to record and follow buffalo migration) in our office to capture the moment  something significant happens with the weather (significant can mean anything from it being sunny, drizzle, rain, hail, sleet or snow).  It only takes one person to shout “Look at the weather” and one of the natural wonders of the world will suddenly happen…a stampede to the windows.  Mouths gaping wide and squeals of “Oh my god, have you seen it”?  And that’s just the men.

Me: “Yes, it’s rain. It’s that wet stuff that falls from the sky” / “Yes, it’s that big yellow thing in the sky making it hot” / “Snow?  Yeh, I’ve seen it loads of times”.

Snow gets people excited for some reason; I can’t take to the stuff personally.  Maybe it’s because I once threw a snowball at an ex-girlfriend, but it turned out that she didn’t catch my drift (Wahey…I’m here all week).

Snow just means venturing outdoors becomes a dice with death.  I end up walking to the shop like an old man…taking dead small steps, as if I’m walking across a balancing beam, ensuring I don’t end up arse over tit.

Luckily enough though, for all the “IT’S SNOWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” messages, even from people who live not far from me and in the same city, I looked out the window this morning and there was feck all snow.  Although, yet again, the news headlines this morning already make one nights snow fall turn into Armageddon like conditions.

It’s December, it gets cold, things will ice up and it’s probably going to snow.  Just get on with it.  If you don’t need to urgently travel anywhere, then don’t.  Why does it become headline news…every year?  I feel sorry for the people caught up behind a jack knifed lorries who were stuck in there cars overnight and things like that, but as a country that is prone to cold weather it’s embarrassing that we can’t cope with snow or ice.  Canadians/Americans who get proper snow drifts must piss themselves laughing that we grind to a halt with a couple of inches of snow.

In other news it’s my last day at work today until 4th Jan. Whoo Hoo.  Productivity today will be zilch.  Who’s brought the Battleships or Connect 4 in?

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16 thoughts on “The Weather

  1. Actually as a Canadian I do giggle a bit when you get a bit of snow and everything shuts down. That being said I am still amazed at how every year here people forget how to drive in winter conditions. Like really we do this every single year! Does the snow and cold cause amnesia?!?!?

    Ok, rant over.

  2. I do tend to laugh when cities get a couple inches of snow and everything closes down for a day or two, especially when it happens in, say, Baltimore.

    The only time things are cancelled for us is if we’re going to get more than 6″, really (I’m 3 hrs north of Boston, and right on the ocean). Last winter, we had several major storms where 2′ was dumped on us overnight. Those are rather fun 🙂

    • J
      Nah, it’s not amnesia, the general public are, in the main, just stupid!

      Lpeg
      Over here people get “snowed in” after a few inches of the stuff. It’s laughable really. There would be a state of emergency if we got 2′ overnight!

  3. Snow brings out my pet peeve about people driving around with a foot of snow on the roof of their car that will eventually:

    a) slide down their front window and blind them for 5 to 10 seconds.

    b) slide off the sides or back and make other cars do the “iceberg in the middle of the road” swerve maneuver.

    c) annoy me.

    Enjoy your holidays. I don’t start holidays until Christmas Eve at 10pm … like most other years. The last class is a real barnburner I can assure you.

    • Brennig
      That’s more like it, proper snow!

      planetross
      Ahh I forgot about the snow on car stuff…I don’t get to see much of that round these here parts. I’ve finished on Christmas Eve a few times it’s a nightmare. Work have (oddly) been generous to us the last few years with Christmas finishing. Hope it doesn’t drag out too much for you.

  4. Ohhh you big old grump. Snow’s amazing fun. This morning, we went and cut ivy from the garden, dragging it in, and seeing it all covered in snow, against the backdrop of decorating the house, twinkly lights everywhere it was BEAUTIFUL

    Your comment about workplaces turning into a pikey’s grotto is perfectly apt though. I’m not a big fan of superfluous decoration, but it’s christmas! It’s beautiful, a time for family and people you love. Furthermore, the cold and the snow just means more excuses to stay under the duvet and watch films. AHHHH HOLIDAYS!

  5. Where Younger Brother lives they got 20″ of snow! (He lives near Washington DC) He may not make it here for the Holidays because they are now expecting ICE! I suppose he could make slushy cocktails then…

  6. I was giggling into my bikini when I saw all the messages on facebook about the snow…so many simultaneously happy people being replaced by absolutely irate people once they realised the snow meant that london / the UK still can’t cope with weather extremes…

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