Like a rabbit caught in headlights

The gig going yet again continued over the weekend, this time it was the turn of Arctic Monkeys to embrace my ears.  I’ve now seen them 6 times.  I like them, but I don’t like them enough to warrant seeing them 6 times so I don’t know how that’s happened.  I think I’m just wanting them to repeat that first gig I seen them at in a university hall just as they came onto the pop pickers chart.  Whilst Saturday didn’t see them hit them highs, they were solid and probably the best I’ve seen them since the first time.  T’was a very fine performance overall.  As we all know I can’t do music reviews so I’ll leave that here!

Before the show however, we discovered the Manchester Christmas market.  Little wooden sheds (or chalets if you’re posh) selling all kinds of Christmassy stuff.  It didn’t take us long to find the German beer she…sorry…chalet and it was here we took shelter from the pissing down rain for a few hours.

It was also here I was ‘introduced’ to a member of the opposite sex…by her mate.  Now, the worst thing that ever happens to me on a night out with my brother is that he attempts to embarrass me in the same way when I mention someone being good looking.  Grabbing the girls attention: “Hello, this is my brother Cynical, what’s your name?”  and then he cajoles the unsuspecting female into awkward conversation.

This very thing happened to me on Saturday: given it seems to be my brothers forté I had to stop myself laughing from shock that the shoe was almost on the other foot…I now know how awkward it feels.  I was embarrassed and I seen her awkwardness straight away, especially with 5 of her mates all staring at me as if I was an animal in a zoo.  I mean what exactly are you supposed to say?  It was only about 6pm too, I hadn’t got nearly enough liquid confidence inside me!  I made my excuses and left…and left the safety of the shed.  We were leaving anyway but it probably looked like I was running away.  Sorry embarrassed female!

Given I moan about being single from time to time it’s probably these situations I should take advantage of.  However whilst I’m probably not too bad at small talk and teeing things up (so to speak), I’m utterly rubbish at going in for the kill….(I’m just staying on the zoo theme here, I don’t mean literally gnawing at her until death).  I’m not really sure what age of the female spectrum I’m attracting either because whilst this female seemed to be a few years older than me I was then chatted up on the train on the way home, by someone who was probably about 20.

I never normally get chatted up, it’s not normal and when it does, like at the weekend, I freeze like a rabbit caught in headlights!  That’s three times in the past 2 weeks.  I must be giving off some wild pheromones lately or something.

Maybe it’s the extra splashings of Brut?!  Hooah.

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15 thoughts on “Like a rabbit caught in headlights

  1. I was watching GMTV this morning (I know, I shouldn’t but hey, I can justify it by not watching any soaps, Strictly or anything with Simon Cowell in) and they were at the Manchester Christmas Market. Spotted the posh sheds – nice!

  2. ! You rebutted two poor souls in a single journey? You’re forgiven if they were repulsive though. What’s with the role reversal, son?

    • ditheringheights
      Bonjourno dithering! Yes I know..I know, I’m a poor excuse for a single male that’s what I am!
      I was in shock for the first one (and she was a little bit grim!), the 2nd one; well I was still recovering from post chatted-up shock ha! No idea what’s going on with the role reversal, I’m not complaining though!

      *splashes extra helpings of Brut and Old Spice*

  3. haha. i love the northern turn of phrase ‘grim’. please stay away from the old spice. Nothing more depressing… Oooh perhaps that’s it! It’s the old spice lulling them into a false sense of dad-like security. 🙂

  4. Always ask for phone numbers … just in case courage or spur of the moments come.
    I don’t follow my own advice most of the time, so I don’t expect you to either.
    It’s just a thought as I sit here numberless.

  5. Hint* Don’t over-do the cologne. There is such a thing as too much. I’m always suspicious of men who wear too much cologne.

    Another hint* STOP GOING OUT WITH YOUR BROTHER!!

    • ditheringheights
      Trust me, I’m as far away from Old Spice as I can possibly be, it was added for comic effect only! Maybe I’m just dad-like without the smell?!

      planetross
      I’m full of great advice too, I never follow my own let alone others!

      S. Le
      I was joking with the cologne thing, I hardly ever wear the stuff (and definitely don’t wear Old Spice or Brut!).

      • I was trying for funny but I fail. Second hint of not going out with your brother still stands though.

  6. A, ‘who’s your daddy’, scene has just irreparably burnt itself onto my retinas. Sob.
    So what kind of man are you? an armani code? a dkny red delicious? a tom ford? A NAKED one?!

    • ditheringheights
      I hope you’ve managed to cool them retinas. Urrgh, ha!
      haha I don’t use the stuff often, I don’t even have any at the min. I think the last one I have was a Givenchy one – no idea which one though!!

  7. I feel the need to apologise for the possible girls chatting you up. You see it could have been me, what with my fondest for the gluhwein at the manchester markets but being neither 20 nor hopefully what I would describe as ‘Grim’ I’m guessing it wasn’t, but making men feel like rabbits in headlights appears to be my forte and I could quite possibly do the same to you one day. So apologies for future me – I can’t help but love a bit of cynicism.

    • singlebuteffective
      Can’t beat them Christmas markets, I might venture out into them today if I can brave the cold. Being single brings on plenty of rabbit in headlight opportunities…the future you is excused 😉

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